#$%!

what a shitty shitty shitty new year.
worst ever.
rainy, lonely, and i just dont like to drink booze so i couldn't even tap that well for relief.
i really hope its the last one i have to sit through, although i know how it sounds.
i don't care, i'm so fuckin tired of this dark place i am in, and i just want out.
i dont suspect im mannic depressive anymore because if i was there would be up times. so perhaps i have graduated to sc depressive.

i dont why the sudden uptick in readers,but readers, if you have something good,
youd better appreciate the hell out of it because trust me, the alternative blows.
at the rate things have been declining, i dont think i can bear to stick around for more of the same.

somebody sent me a mental health assessment from duke university-an online link-and before i got past the first 6 questions i got a pop up from the site telling me to call 911.
how funny/sad is that??